Feeling Duaghnted

As I was writing yesterday I realised that I really really do feel completely overwhelmed by the Punk Project as a whole – not just the novel. It is huge! It is so huge that it is going to take my lifetime to write and that frankly scares me!

Why does it scare me?

Well a) do I really want to spend all that time in my life on this one project and b) what use is it? No really – I always thought when I was younger I would give something to society and when say I was working on meteorites it felt like I was doing something for mankind yet here I am finding that my life work is going to consist of the sort of tacky scifi people ban their kids from watching/reading. And yet I am going all out with it – I am researching things, historical fact is as correct as it can be within the confines of the story. The same with the science and technology, I have looked at where I think new techs can go and what they can achieve – I have looked at the socio-political consequences and outcomes of certain actions etc… There is a lot of work and alot of actually quiet useful information going into the novel including the darker aspects of human behaviour and how the victims respond and cope with this!

My research list is massive though and my brain feels like a collindar trying to hold onto custard.

With it having taken me over a year to produce the first novel and then I am having to cut it in half :/ I just can’t really see me ever getting the whole lot written :(

Add in the fact that I really do still want to do the graphic novel starting from the beginning of the Punks story and working forward – the art work alone would take years and some of it I don’t even know how to draw :( But I’m not sure I can collaborate with anyone on this project either.

Every history section of her life I write is going to have to be researched so heavily too. The number of short stories and spin offs that are pushing at me too be written is quiet scary too.

On the other hand – the novel I am submitting for the Pratchette Prize was easy to write because of research I had done for The Punk. And my science writing has also benifieted from it. I just sort of need to convince myself that this is a) actually doable in one life time and that b) it is worth it for both me and society.

Posted: Monday, November 29th, 2010 @ 12:24 pm
Categories: Uncategorized.
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